To everyone here in LJ Happy Mothers day! I hope you all have a fantastic day.
I will be spending my morning typing furiously in my notepad, which I haven't been able to do that lately. :)
I deal with the public day in and day out. I love working with people and there are days that it seems less enjoyable. As a result of my work in recent years I have become more and more careful with how I conduct myself because seeing others reactions really leaves an impression in you.
Today I was in browsing in Goodreads and a friend email me a blog post from bec_fitzpatrick title ‘Be nice’ I read the entire entry but when I got to the comments my mind burst in a fit. Perhaps it’s because I see day and day out people that seem to believe that to express your discontent with something you clearly must be rude about it to get your point across. I can assure you folks that this is not the case. Same thing can be said in reading. So I lost my head and posted a brief rant about this not only there but I will do so here too. Here is what I said in Goodreads:
Normally I don't post in online discussions such as this. But, I'm going to break my own rule for today. Day in and day out I see people that seem to think that posting an online scathing trashy review is actually expressing your opinion. How odd that in a post where the person is saying 'be nice' some folks choose to be so rude about their opinions. Here is a clue folks; the ruder you are about your opinion the less likely you are to be taken seriously.
Look nobody is saying you can't have your opinion. If you all read the blog entry above, Mrs. Fitzpatrick CLEARLY says so and even suggest one way to do it. Everyone should you have an opinion but you should express it in a way that would be a benefit to the author, and her/his work. Nobody ever learn from flattery alone. However, when you use a scathing way to express your opinion it becomes extremely difficult to identify your real issue with the book. Try treating others the way YOU like to be treated. Do you want to read a bunch of insults about your work? Or would you prefer to points of characterization and plot that made the book not such a fun read? Try seating yourself in the receiving end of the review and stop proclaiming to the world your right to say whatever you like. Yes, we all get it you, and everyone else has freedom of speech, but having it doesn’t mean that you have to be rude about your opinion. Try being tactful and respectful and I can honestly say that your opinion may end up being one of the most important reviews that the author may have received.
Again, express your opinion in a way that we can all identify the controversial, failing or weak points of the books. It help others to later determined if the book could be right or wrong for them based on the things you said. However, when you launch personal attacks towards the author, and do a healthy trash of the book the review becomes laughable and in all honesty not worth to be taken seriously. So yes ‘be nice’ so authors can understand what could be the weakest points of their books; and where do they need to improve. Because by telling them that they suck, don’t know how to write, or that they have a hidden agenda you insult them and quite honestly it says more about you, than about the book.
Don’t expect to burn everyone with your words and get compliments in return. Life doesn’t work that way.
I seriously learned a lot from the people that nicely and calmly explained the failing points of my work. I appreciate them and consider them because I don't have a big ego to believe I know it all. Life is a learning process and more than happy to be a student every day. However, it really gets me going when people feel the need to burn others with their words as if that makes them superior or more educated. Not every book will be your cup of tea and what you considerer a weak point in a book maybe the strongest for another one. Reading is subjective and that is what it constantly fascinates me about books.
It seems that in every corner there is a bully waiting to strike, and today I seem to have no patience for it.
So much for Sunday = Funday…
Confession: We are obsessed with this show. The books are equally awesome too. Is anyone else as obsessed as me and my girls are?
I have been a little detached of the online activity mostly because I have been sick and working a lot of hours. Now that I'm better I hope to be more active. I haven't been able to do a lot of writing but I have advanced some. Mostly I have been reading.
In my Goodreads account I have a special rating system for books. I copy this idea off other authors because first, I didn't agree with the Goodreads rating system and it seemed a much better way to say if I like the book or not. I think authors put a lot of heart and soul into their creations and I understand if they are somewhat sensitive to criticism that may come their way. Also, I treat them as I would like to be treated if someone does not like one of my creations.
With that said I like to discuss an ongoing trend that lately it has been popping in young adult literature and that it annoys both me and my daughter. My daughter has been following a series that she has dearly loved. The last book came out at the end of October and this weekend she finally reached it on her reading pile; she was severely disappointed. In fact saying severely is an understatement. She actually thru the book against the wall and loudly proclaimed that she wanted the hours she spend on the series back. There are many, many reasons but she was really angry at the way two characters never got together and one of the characters seemed to do a hundred and eighty degrees spin and changed her mind. My daughter was expecting a big romance between the two of them and instead got an endless tale, which made no sense to her. This is not the first book she finds this in a book and to put it mildly she is sick of it.
I have always felt that authors are not responsible to teach kids anything or set an example with their characters. That responsibility belongs to parents and it is tough luck if they don’t like it. Every time I read a review and I hear someone saying about how this character is a bad example for young girls I grit my teeth. No, no, no! Furthermore, when I search I discover that most of the times this recommendations come from either mothers or women past the teenage years. It seemed that those people have forgotten what it feels to be that age. I completely understand why Twilight appeals to young girls, it’s a sweet story with a lot of romance and new things. Discovering love and all the wonderful things that come with the adolescent age is something to be enjoyed. However some feel that it is necessary to remind girls the way their lives should go and constantly warned them about the dangers of depending on a man and not having a career.
To be honest we are not really doing any favors to young girls to give them a speech any time we get a chance to on how they should conduct their lives. Transferring this speech into literature and insisting that the characters, specifically females, show an independent and 'I don't need anyone' view of life really irks many girls. It goes one ear and out the next without being actually being consider. Heck it annoys me, and I’m a grown woman. I’m well aware that this may not be what the authors are seeking with their story, but it is how the girls perceive it. I do not understand why we women can’t be workers, mothers, and wife at the same time. Love doesn't makes us less of a person and we are not half without it. I simply do not get why readers, or authors, would feel either way and transfer that to stories. Love is simply a beautiful human emotion and we should be proud of it not trying to diminish or change it. I think that would be a much better example and lesson for girls instead of trying to hide, diminish or down play it.
Love doesn't makes us less of a person and we are not half without it. I simply do not get why readers, or authors, would feel either way and transfer that to stories. Love is simply a beautiful human emotion and we should be proud of it not trying to diminish or change it. I think that would be a much better example and lesson for girls instead of trying to hide, diminish or down play it.
The idea becomes impossible to stand when it comes in a historical fiction book when readers know that the options for woman where a lot less. It is especially frustrating that for some reason the author develops a romance and apparently lead readers to believe that this was the way the series is headed for, then suddenly changes her mind and gives not explanation as of why everything change. I’m a huge fan of continuity when reading and something that pops out of thin air makes me feel as if the author was trying to fool me or had a poor plan for the book. One of my friends wondered if authors realize that they are unconsciously, or consciously, doing this. If it’s conscious then why do they feel the need to lecture people? If it’s not then still why is it popping in?
In my personal view I think authors should write whatever story pleases them. However, I feel they should be careful not to mislead readers. It annoys readers and makes them feel as if they were taken for fools, nobody likes that.
What do you think?